I started to miss him...

I just finished reading this article which was posted by Zooey Deschanel with the title " How to tell if someone really, really likes you ". Link below.
http://hellogiggles.com/tell-really-really-likes
That is totally what he did to me. This article reminds me of him, I miss him so much all of a sudden. Those eyes and smiles he gave me, I could tell he really really likes me.
We were so in love, we loved each other's company, but we just can't be together. We live far from each other :'(
We fell in love in a matter of 2 days. I never believed people could fall in love so fast, but it happened to me. It was one of a kind, beautiful and we couldn't stop thinking about each other. Those 2 days were my happiest days, and the 2nd day was my saddest day coz i know we had to say goodbye and part. It was the first and last time I met him.
We kept in touch after I came back to my country. He gave me calls everyday, we chatted on the phone. Day and night.
But because of this great distance, I suggested we should not take it into a relationship. He was so sad to hear that. He said he doesn't care about anything else he just wants to be with me. But it is just me, I can't, I know how I am. I just, can't. I feel sorry for him. I have reasons not to be with him but I'm just never sure whether they are strong enough to keep me away from him.
He told me, he will wait for me, forever. :(

7/24/14, 7:31PM

Empty

I feel so empty without you.

It takes time to fall in love, letting go does too.

I thought I've let it go completely, but I'm so wrong about it.
2 months are clearly not enough.


7/16/12, 11:54 AM
Malaysia Time

Emo drawings

My previous emo drawings.
Sad times.

 


4/2/12, 2:34 AM
Malaysia Time

Heartbroken

I draw when I'm heartbroken :(

I am so weak and i hate it.
What the hell am i thinking?? arghh
 

4/1/12, 11:56 PM
Malaysia Time

Alice in Wonderland costumes!

Yay im'ma start making 2 costumes from Tim Burton's movie Alice in Wonderland. I'll be making Alice and the Queen of Hearts! I'm so excited!

I've done fabric sourcing. I will start buying fabrics tomorrow if it's possible. Hopefully i can get the costumes done within this week.

There will be some changes on the costumes, it won't be exactly the same costumes as in the movie, but anyway from far they still look similar. Those rough sketches as below show Alice,Mad Hatter,Queen of Hearts, Tweedledee and Tweedledum, as i was going to make all 5 costumes but in the end decided to make just Alice and the Red Queen :)


PK Outing :)

Been to a 3-day-2-night outing with the theme 'Direction'. Overall was great! Was so tired during the finale night. Maybe i laughed too hard. LOL. Those guys were so funny they dressed up as girls while we girls dressed up as guys, hmm girls weren't funny coz we were supposed to look cool xD.

Few of them looked the funniest, Emerson, Thye Yuen, Poh Lai, Kenji and Cherng Dar. I couldn't help myself but kept laughing. haha. I haven't got the photos yet. Will post them here once the photos are uploaded on facebook.

I was responsible for the hall decoration and PA system, basically an artist and a DJ ~lol xD. But i'm not pro at music mixing yet, need more time to practice :S. Virtual DJ software is so fun to use. Love it. Just found out that it can actually cut songs too! Which is a plus for me.

Hall decoration was simple, but i guess they liked it. Alphabet cut-outs, a goth tree and little compasses. I call it the goth tree i don't know about you. Those alphabets and chinese characters were cut out at home, i brought them to the place and decorated the hall, actually just the walls XD. Sticked them on it.

Took time on the tree, coz i thought it would be big enough for the wall, who knew when i placed the tree on the wall it looked freakin small, and the box cards were limited, so i had to cut out the shapes of branches and join them on to make it look bigger. Wasn't as big as i want in the end but still looked better than before. Will post the pic when i get it.

Hopefully on the next outing in the future my siblings,cousins and friends could all join. They couldn't join this outing with all kinds of reasons. They've missed out on something fun.

During the finale night me and emerson got so bored and sleepy, we could only see those participants' back when they were playing games.Zzzz. Until we got to play the game in the end where each of us has a sticker with our names on sticking on our back and our enemies have to pull it off and we have to pull theirs off. Who loses their name will be out of the game. THE GAME WAS SO FUN I LOVED IT!
I couldn't stop screaming and laughing during the game.We all looked like a bunch of monkeys and bulls. LOLOLOL!! Especially those guys in dresses acting like a man while playing the game. So funny!

After the event, we all didn't wanna go to bed although it was nearly 12am,coz the next day we would be leaving. So they suggested us to play games. 007, Killers/Doctors/Spies and Truth or Dare. Was fun.

Truth or dare was the one game that got everyone so excited and anxious coz whoever gets pointed by the spinning bottle when it stops would have to tell the truth to any questions asked by other players in the circle. Gotta stand in the middle. I was hoping it wouldn't point at me but got pointed somehow, lol. Was okay though. I wasn't as anxious as i thought. 1 talkative guy asked would i marry him if he asked, i was like what the hell you don't even know me.LOL. Okay nevermind it wasn't counted as a question, then he asked a personal question around the crowds 'do you have a boyfriend?'~I said no. Then he continued 'Who do you like?' I answered Bernhard. I'm not sure if i still like him though,i'm confused. Haiz. Later Ralim asked 'can you ask the guy(the talkative guy) what's his name?' Everyone booed at him coz it was lame.LOL. I went back to my seat, next round i wanted to quit when asked who wants to go to bed now.I was the first one putting my hand up as i felt heaty inside,i had to sleep,it was 2am already.
I was the only girl who left though. Kinda embarrassing. Damn those kids just wouldn't sleep! hahahh. So i left. Those people must have thought that i got embarrassed so i left. Hopefully not though. haha i looked like i don't give a damn. Didn't even glance at the guy once after that :S

The next morning my friends told me the guy said if i don't go back to the game he would propose to me during the impression sharing session later today, they told me to prepare. They said he's crazy, coz they know i sure wouldn't fall for a guy like him. LOL. It was nothing though. Just a game, i didn't mind. He didn't do it during the impression sharing though. Phieww~he's a daring person man! Thought he would but luckily he didn't :S

Back to my job, i liked being a DJ a lot! Got to play music :). Guess they knew i love music so they gave me this responsibility. Hopefully the next outing i get to be a DJ too! :)

1/4/12, 2:24 PM
Malaysia Time

Funny 'awkward moment' lines and pictures! LOL

1. That awkward moment when you say bye to someone but both of you keep walking the same way.

2. That awkward moment when you fart during a moment of silence.

3. That awkward moment when you forget to lock the toilet door, and someone walks in.

4. That awkward moment when 2 friends (a boy and a girl) watch a movie together and a sex scene appears in it.

5. That awkward moment when you try to fart quietly and shit runs down your leg. (LOL)

6. That awkward moment when you try to fart while music is playing, but it gets all quiet when you do. (LMAO!)

7. That awkward moment when the guy you like is talking to you and you don't get what he's saying but you're afraid to say huh for the 2nd time (cause it makes you look dumb) so you just agree and smile instead. But he actually knows you don't get him. (This is me x.x )








Photobucket

Laptop!

I have been using my laptop, hmm not to say mine, it was bought 4 or 5 years ago for someone else in the first place =__=. I ended up being the one taking over the laptop after the guy was fired from my dad's office. I think the guy used it for a year. Good thing it was still in a good condition after it was passed to me though.

Anyway, it has been mine since then, i have been using it for like 4 years if i'm not mistaken, it's still good. the model is Acer Aspire 4715z. (Picture below)
Lousy looking laptop but i'm greatful to have it though. Zzzzz. Well i needed a laptop for college. Can't believe it survives until now. I faced a problem which the screen went white whenever i moved it, loose wire caused it i guess. I solved it myself after living with the problem for like 2 years! Goshh! I solved it with just a few pieces of TISSUE! I was a genius =_=



My siblings had been changing their laptops (laptops which really belong to them) for like 2 times already, and now, after the PC fair we went on last Sunday, both my bro and my sis have bought new laptops!
Arhhhhh J-E-A-L-O-U-S!!

Bro had an Acer PC desktop, now using the new Asus G53S gaming laptop. (Picture below)




My sis first had Fujitsu, which sucks big time! It's now with my mom =_=. Then she got Dell. Can't recall which series. Now she got Toshiba Satellite L600! (Picture below)



Me? T_____T I want the ALIENWARE M17X! Or maybe M14X. (Both picture below). I saw both sizes the other day, M17X is seriously huge! M14X will do i guess. Alienware's laptops just look bigger than the other brands' laptops.
People around me are telling me not to get it coz it's costly and that i'm not of a hardcore gamer. So what? I play games too and i want a laptop which can be lasting and has freakin good specs! and looks special of course xD
I don't play too much of games now coz my laptop doesn't support high graphic games, it'll turn my laptop speed into the speed of a snail if you know what i mean. Sigh.
Everything about ALIENWARE is just so perfect! The lighting and the audio. So i think it's kind of worth the price. I will try to get it in the future!
I even dreamed of Alienware's alien alive after the PC fair the other night. It seriously shows how bad i want it >___<




If it's not the Alienware, my second choice would be HP Envy 14 Beats! Since i'm a music freak, this one will surely rock me! The specs are not bad too. It's good enough for me. The audio sure is trustable coz it's BEATS! Actually this model is more pricey than Alienware M14X =/.Anyway Alienware is definitely my top choice!


Heartache


My heart is aching so bad. I really don't know what's right to do, or what else to say to make him feel better.
I feel so sorry for hurting him, but what i told him was the fact, the saddest fact. I had to say it, it's true from my heart.
Miracles do happen sometimes though, unexpectable things do happen. But what happened last night just happened too fast i couldn't accept it.

I don't get why guys and girls can never be just friends or best friends.
Being a couple doesn't mean the world.
Being best friends is way better than being a couple.
We can talk,we can laugh,we share good and bad times together.
Go through everything together.

Being a couple, heartbreaks just never fail to occur. And when it does, everything will be over. It would hurt so bad one day when they find out that their relationship cannot last any longer. In the end people would just end up being strangers again. For me THAT IS JUST ONE OF THE WORST THINGS THAT COULD HAPPEN!

Think about it, if you really like the person so much, you wish to get close but there are some obstacles to stop you from doing so, isn't being best friends the best choice instead? That's how i feel, because it will last forever.
Or maybe i feel insecure for accepting someone i don't know much yet.

Heartbreaks came to me last night, not only one but two. I really couldn't take it. I broke into tears, inside i really felt like dying, was helpless.
He didn't understand how i felt. It was actually a very bad timing for telling me how he feels about me.

I have to wear a mask. I can't show my emotions in the public.
I'm writing all this because it's one of the ways which i can express myself other than just sharing my heartbreaks with my best friend and my sister.

I'm extremely upset.
Why do i always have to go through all this after a damn good friendship with someone for like so many times. I'm tired. I don't know what should i do.

Hope every guy learns that, whatever a girl says to stop you from entering her heart, it doesn't always mean that you should give up on her.
The girl will learn to appreciate how true you are to her someday regardless the rules of her life.
Keep chasing whatever you're chasing, in the end anything could happen. Even though you were told that it's not gonna happen.

If everyone gives up so easily with just one obstacle, they will never succeed.


My heart aches
when I talk to you,
when I don’t hear from you,
when I long for you.

My heart aches.
The pains eat away my soul.
My mind wants control,
but it has taken me away.

Costumes for Comic Fiesta 2011


Here are my sketches for the vampire costumes which I will be making ;)~ Only 5 will be chosen among these designs. They're for me, my sister and friends.

I have been working on the drafting, and some pattern pieces are done but i can't go on coz i haven't bought the fabrics yet. Haiz. Seriously can't wait to get them done! 1 month to go! ♥

My life has moved on


The resignation letter was given to my ex-company since 13 July 2011. It was a one-month notice, so without any delay, my job in Padini Holdings Berhad (P&Co.) ended on 12 August 2011.

I have moved on to another life. Who doesn't hope to walk the right path in life. I do :D. There's so much more to live. You can't just get stuck in the same place learning/doing the almost-same-things everyday. Get yo ass outta there, get a new life/new job, learn more and start chasing your dream! :) "Learn as if you were to live forever"

Everyone hopes for the good in their lives, but you know what, there's no such thing as 'hope'. You have to work hard for yourself in order to achieve something that you want. All the best to me and y'all!

Before a tough life is going to start, an 11-day trip is coming soon on 12 September 2011! Europe trip! It is gonna be awesome! Thanks to my mom! Yayyyy :)))